It has been a couple of weeks now that I have been trying to write this blog post. Each time I went to sit down, I couldn’t seem to accurately convey my feelings. The words were not flowing because I couldn’t seem to make them all fit together. I had a lot of things that I wanted to share, but I couldn’t figure out the way they related to each other. I know that especially in this next season of life, that things will not always fit together or be related to each other. Life is messy and confusing and often times we don’t really ever see the big picture until later. We never understand His plans for us until we can look back in our rearview mirrors (see my last blog post for this reference!) and even then sometimes we still won’t understand His plan – we just have to trust it. I am learning to give up control, but right now when everything around me is changing, I seem to be a little hung up on the fact that I want everything to fit together and to make sense.
Anyways, life in the last two months since my last blog post has gone by extremely fast. It was really a time of lasts and goodbyes to that period in my life. High school has come and gone. Sometimes it’s scary to think about the future and what it holds. The future is now an open road and a lot of the time, I can become overwhelmed by it. It is easy to let fear kick in and it is also easy to take this new freedom and run with it in the direction of our own choosing. Sometimes I just want to make my own path, follow my own heart, and not listen to what God or anyone else wants to tell me.
A few weeks ago I was at church with my mom. We were talking to some friends and missionaries who served in Nicaragua (the third country that my squad and I will also serve in!) and we were talking about the end of the school year and celebrations. The point came up that they were having a tough weekend. Life seemed to be getting in the way of the joyful and big events that they were trying to celebrate. They mentioned that in the book of Mark, there are 3 times that the devil appears. Interestingly, in each moment he comes in a period of transition. In the moments when we can be easily distracted. John 10:10 says that “the thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy.” Scary thing to think about, huh. The thief comes only to attack us. To steal our joy in moments of celebration, to steal our hope in moments of fear, to steal anything away that is a gift from God or anything that glorifies Him. In moments of transition from one season of life to another, it is easy to become lost; to stray from the One who gives us strength and guides us always. It is easy to turn to whatever thing that we as humans deem important enough to guide and fulfill us. It is easy to follow our own deceitful hearts. I’ll be honest. In these last few months, it has not been easy to turn to Him and lean on Him. I stray and turn to things that I know will not ever bring me fulfillment. They may bring happiness, but this happiness is only temporary. In times of transition, especially this one right now, it is easy to find myself feeling lost.
But, the good news is that the verse in John 10:10 continues on and God promises us: “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” This is God’s invitation to us. He came so that each day we are invited to do this thing called life. We are invited to live a life with Him – never alone. This life that He gives us is full and good. This afternoon I was sitting outside in my hammock reading Love Does. In this chapter, Bob talks about the many things in life that we do not get an invitation to like the White House Easter egg hunt or to the Oscars. Most if not all people would jump at the opportunity to be apart of these events given an invitation. He went on to talk about the invitation that God has given us, the promise in John 10:10. But, it is easy to turn down this invitation. The very invitation that promises a “life of complete engagement, a life of whimsy, a life where love does.”
Maybe your turning down of His invitation is in times of transitions like it seems to be for me. Maybe it is in your moments of fear and doubt. Your moments of anger. Your moments of hurt. Your moments of confusion. The reality is that this invitation to fully participate in this amazing life for one more day can easily be turned down. We do it all the time. It comes in many forms. “It looks like numbing yourself or distracting yourself or seeing something really beautiful as just normal.”
The first time that I ever felt invited to come and sit at the table, was really the beginning of my own faith journey. The invitation to a life with Him and the goodness of it is undeniable. It is a gift. We are never forced to accept the invitation and God loves us just the same. He just keeps looking for people to invite, not to just fill space at His table, but because he so desires for us to live life and have it to the full. He invites us by name with each and every new day. The offer always stands no matter how many times we stray. The really crazy thing though is that when we do accept His invitation, our lives begin to transform. Bob says that “obstacles that seem insurmountable aren’t. Impediments that we believe disqualify us don’t.” This invitation is an invitation to participate and to show up. It will look different for each and every person and it will look different at each new season of life. When we say yes to coming and sitting at His table, other people begin to watch and see “the big life” too.
Being invited into His Kingdom is by far the best gift that I have ever received. It is one of the big reasons that I chose to go on the World Race. I want people to know that they are invited and called by name to come and sit at the table and do life with Jesus. I want people to find the joy and peace that His invitation brings if they choose to accept. His love and sacrifice for us is so great, it blows my mind. He says come, all we ever have to do is say yes and lean in. Best gift ever, right?
-Elena
PS I would love if you would share this link with anyone and everyone who is interested!
Elena – thank you for your amazing sharing. Believe it or not, I was just like you at your age. I was blessed to have parents who taught me that going through life with God was the only way to “roll” – and I bought in big time. Reading your blog brought back so many incredible memories and it also made me want to share how fear got in my way so many years ago. The Peace Corp was a dream but fear took over and I went off to college and life just kept moving. But I did not let go of the dream – because it came from God! Now, so many years later, I am able to work with poverty stricken children in horrendous living conditions and I can share God’s gift of love in every way possible. I am thrilled that you have overcome the Devil’s tool of fear and because of that, your life will be forever changed. Bless every breath you take and every move you make! God is rooting for you! And so am I!!!!
Looking forward to meeting you in just ONE month! It can be overwhelming thinking too far into the future. Just be ready to be obedient to the next step God has for you and watch for what is in store today. The race is such a great opportunity to learn to hear from God.
I’m looking forward to seeing what you do on all your trips, we’re very excited for you, Elena!